21 January 2006



calmer times















Sylvia Plath wrote, on Aug 6 1952:

"Is everything we do an attempt to choose between the lesser of two evils? Is man, in this sense, born in original sin? Or perhaps just born into a world of "sin", sin being the tragic dilemma of making wrong or less wrong choices, with nothing to approve or condone the choice - nothing but the fruits of the choice and attendant action to decree whether the choice was good or bad. And even, then, always, the doubt."

How else to explain the strange paths our stars have decided to take? Perhaps we only grow through pain, or fear, and in parting, we find something we'd lost along the way.
Through all that, through all these, I just want to be safe, and healthy, and happy. It is a realm, ultimately, that is man-made. But I know now, that Life is not about the Big Things, but what can occur in that nano second, between each breath.


D woke up at 1/21/2006 02:33:00 PM [comment]

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15 January 2006

In Death it all ends, in Death, nothing is resolved nor reconciled, except for, maybe (for we can only speculate), the Dead.

We have many names for this final journey. Some call it a homecoming. Usually, we say a departure, for the departed, a funeral, for an end or a cessation of existence, a wake, to watch over the body of the dead before burial, the deceased; we have many ways to say our last goodbye.

I said my prayers, and I say "Goodbye".

And I pray that the living will stay strong and hang on, for this goodbye is temporal, a ceremony, a ritual. The real farewell will never have to take place, as he stays in the heart. We all leave, as we sometimes have to, but we know we will meet again, at a better place.


D woke up at 1/15/2006 04:20:00 PM [comment]

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08 January 2006

Filthy/Gorgeous pictures will come later.
But the Filthy/Gorgeous Happy guy's card will come first.

We made this in an afternoon, much to the displeasure of my grandfather.

It's funny but we never really gave thought to the poses but the final chosen pictures reflect our personalities. Hanis and his cheery disposition, Sheila's feminity (accompanied with a whine), Pamela's persistent laughter (at things-which-are-not-funny), Sharon's independence, Haireez, yes, poseur, my hysteria and fondness for exaggeration, and lastly, Liwen, who is always smiling at our jokes, enjoying our company in the corner. If Rohai were pictured in this composition, I think he'd have been in red, or scarlet or maroon. And there'd be a feather boa or a tiara and lighting that is oh-so-bright. He is the Queen, after all.

Friends friends friends friends.

We can not meet for the longest time, yet we're always at home with one another, always.




D woke up at 1/08/2006 01:47:00 AM [comment]

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07 January 2006

I just want to sleep and rest and drink lots and lots of water at home but it is birthday month as well as it is:



So I guess, too bad. I'd be literally Filthy Gorgeous at Ro's Super Sweet Sixteen. (What a BIG sixteen he is.)




I spoke on the phone for close to two hours last night. There was no conclusion to the conversation, or to the topics we were dealing with. The phone conversation would have continued through the night if not for the fully scheduled day, today. My thoughts raced later through the night, much further into what is "near-distant" future.
I guess matriculating today seals my fate.
Money has to come first, to fund my hobby.


D woke up at 1/07/2006 12:20:00 PM [comment]

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